Lessons Learned

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2025-04-12 15:34:38

Lessons Learned

lessons@hubzilla.monster

Victory and defeat are rules, not outcomes. If you failed, but learned something, you did not fail.

2025-04-11 13:41:41

Lessons Learned

lessons@hubzilla.monster

If you don't address the root of the problem, you wind up creating more problems down the line.

2025-04-11 13:39:41

Lessons Learned

lessons@hubzilla.monster

"You either listen to your wife now, or you listen to her in therapy, or you listen to her in divorce."

2025-04-11 08:20:45

Lessons Learned

lessons@hubzilla.monster

Sometimes it is good to reflect on the lessons that you learned to remind yourself and also to check to see if they are still valid.

Some People Take Things Literally

2024-02-12 07:19:33

Lessons Learned

lessons@hubzilla.monster

You have to be careful when communicating with people. Some people take what you say literally, so you have to choose your words very carefully. For some people, metaphors and sarcasm and even phrases go over their heads.

And if you are outlining a set of tasks they need to do, be sure to list everything. And I mean everything. Unless you have worked with them for awhile, don't assume they have common knowledge or even common sense.

To give you an example, I once asked a new hire in my office to file some paperwork. I showed her how to sort the papers and put them in the proper folders. I let her get to work. I came back, and everything was just randomly placed in the filing cabinet. I had to tell her that it was supposed to be in alphabetical order.

It wasn't because she was stupid. She was just young and had never worked in an office before. Once I told her how it should be done, she did it perfectly.

But I have had this happen with even well-educated developers too.

I have told developers to make our software work like some other software they should be familiar with (like email), and they come back with something that looks nothing like email. When you ask them if they used email before, they say yes. But then the resulting code is nothing like email. So I learned that I had to go back and explain what an email interface looks like and had to detail exactly how it should work. Apparently, giving them an example UI from another piece of software and telling them to mimic it is not enough for them. You actually have to write up detailed specs.

So, sometimes you have to be a bit more detailed, especially in the beginning, because they might not understand and might miss important details.

And some people just don't understand sarcasm or metaphors anymore. If you say that you should "eat an elephant one steak at a time," they will literally think you support eating elephants in real life. They don't understand it is a metaphor. And then you have an online argument over a misunderstanding.

Maybe it is the education system, or maybe it was all of that lead paint and leaded fuel that used to be common, or maybe it is difference between cultures, or an error in translation, or maybe it is the food we eat. I am not sure. But you certainly have to be more careful with how you speak these days.

Interpersonal

Managing My Energy

2024-02-12 06:40:24

Lessons Learned

lessons@hubzilla.monster

I have been struggling with being productive for a long time. On some days I am super productive, and on other days I am super unproductive. And I can't chose when that happens. It even happens when I get a good night's rest, and it's worse if I don't. And this has always bothered me.

When I was younger, I thought I might be depressed. And I did have some negative self-talk where I devalued myself compared to others, so there was evidence to back that up. But one day I realized that I wasn't really depressed... I was just tired... physically exhausted. If I got rest, I would feel fine again. If I really were depressed, I would still be depressed after I rested.

Years later I had a doctor who diagnosed me with Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. At the time, it was a new field of study, so it wasn't something they could test you for. Her diagnosis was based on what I told her and a basic physical examination. I didn't believe her at the time. I thought that since she was studying the disease and writing a paper on it, she was prone to seeing it even when evidence was scarce. From my perspective, I told her I got tired a lot, and she responded with a diagnosis based on just that.

For decades I struggled with this problem. And now I have proof that it is real thanks to a Fitbit.

If you have the premium package, it calculates your readiness score. I looks like they figured out how to measure it now, because on days that I am not productive, I will have readiness scores in the single digits. On a good day, I will have a readiness score of 100, and on a bad day, I might have a readiness score or 1 or 6.

I absolutely get nothing done when I have a readiness score that low. I procrastinate. I get distracted easily. I go down unproductive rabbit holes. I don't think clearly. I don't make sound decisions. I make mistakes. And, ironically. I will forget to rest since I am not thinking clearly.

Part of it is because I am not getting enough sleep. But getting enough sleep isn't always enough. I can be well-rested, and still wind up running out of energy. So there is something more to this than getting enough sleep.

I am not sure how to solve the problem yet, but I do know I need to manage my energy, and I do know that my productivity directly corresponds with my body's state.

And, more importantly, I have realized that it is something physical. It is not depression. It is not laziness. It is not mindset. Because when I am full of energy, I am very productive. Now that I know what is causing me to be unproductive, I can work on that.

Energy Productivity Chronic Fatigue Health

Random Lessons Learned

2024-02-12 06:08:57

Lessons Learned

lessons@hubzilla.monster

I decided to create this channel on the fediverse to share various lessons I have learned, both recently and in the past. This will be an open anonymous blog of my growth and struggles, while at the same time I hope that some of the things that I have learned will help other people going through similar things. Some of the lessons will be personal, some will be interpersonal, and some will be related to career and business. Some will be things everyone experiences, and some things will be unique or even controversial. Feel free to comment and add to the discussion in a positive way. I am always open to learn and grow.